Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Remakes Vs. The Originals

 Remakes Vs. The Originals.


Oh remakes. There have been quite a few in the last twenty years. For a brief period of time it seemed absolutely hopeless as classics were being retold with little to no effort. Here they were just simply being cashed in simply for the title. As much as remakes get a bad name, some are actually really good. It's rare that they are better than the original, but sometimes they are actually half way decent. Almost as a good re-telling, or as a stand alone film. Here we'll list off twenty remakes going against the originals and see which ones were better, worse, or came to a tie!


1) The Thing Vs. The Thing = Remake
- Crazy effects that seriously haven't been able to be topped, Kurt drinking giving zero fucks, and one HELL of an ending! This brilliant update from the 1950's sci-fi movie is complete and utter perfection.

2) The Shinning Vs. The Shinning = Original 
- Hard to believe that I actually don't like the novel. Maybe that's why I prefer the original than the mini series remake that's closer to the book King wrote. I'm sorry, but nothing can capture this creepy down right terrifying tale of a man possessed by a haunted hotel. King, I love you...but Stanley knew exactly what he was doing with this one.

3) Psycho Vs. Psycho = Original
- Nothing will ever defeat Hitchcock's classic. I down right LOVE the sequel, and of course the prequel of Bates Motel that just ended a few weeks ago, but sadly the artsy colored remake in 98 suffered from bad casting, and fell flat not being able to capture the shock valve the original held.

4) Invasion Of The Body Snatchers Vs. Invasion Of The Body Snatchers = Tie
- Not counting the made for TV 90's version, or the morning as hell re-telling from the mid 2000's, we're talking the 50's and 70's version. The 1950's story is actually super creepy, and if only they had ended with the scene of the lead screaming at the cars on the highway I think this would have been a near perfect film. Still, it was years ahead of it's time, and one of the best science fiction/horror films out there. The 70's film ups the creep factor up to a million. With a stellar cast, and modern updates, this re-telling is very enjoyable. My favorite of course has to be the ending. Love the credits over silence. Get's me every time.

5) The Hills Have Eyes Vs. The Hills Have Eyes = Tie
- Love Wes Craven's original Hills Have Eyes. It's a gritty brutal horror film that hands down is one of the best from the 1970's. The remake was released when remakes were actually half way decent and besides Dawn Of The Dead, this in my eyes is one of the other better remakes there are. They took the same overall storyline but cranked it up to 11 with it's violence and gore.

6) Friday the 13th Vs. Friday the 13th = Original
- A lot of Friday the 13th fans actually forget the original film that started it all. In fact lots of friends of mine have complained that this film is too slow. WHAT?! I'm sorry, but the pacing of the original was just fine. We have a creepy setting of the campy that's legit in the middle of nowhere, the unseen killer, and the huge twist in the end. In fact I would say the original Friday the 13th has one of the greatest pop-outs of all time. The remake felt like just a bad sequel. I feel they really could have done something here and instead we just got another dumb slasher film where Jason was basically just a pot farmer.

7) Halloween Vs. Halloween = Original
- I'll admit. I actually really enjoyed Rob Zombie's Halloween. Was it a great movie? No. Still, I have lots of great memories seeing this when it came out on my 19th birthday with my mother who was a massive Halloween fan. Still, as fun as this remake was with all of it's uber violence, nothing quite captures John Carpenter's elegant slasher. Between the small town, Michael Myers, Jamie Lee Curtis, Loomis, and the heat beating score, this hands down is one of the best horror films ever made. Simple, but very effective. 

8) My Bloody Valentine Vs. My Bloody Valentine = Tie
- My Bloody Valentine is one of my all time favorite slasher/horror films of all time. The remake was just as good. Both films take place in a small town, have likable characters, tons of gore, and of course the awesome fact it takes place on Valentine's Day. Both films have great endings, and yet again is one of the rare times when a remake is just as good as the original. Also it was one of the few times a movie in 3D was really awesome. 

9) A Nightmare On Elm Street Vs. A Nightmare On Elm Street = Original 
- There's only one other film on this list that has the worst remake to it. This is a simple case of such a wasted opportunity. I remember seeing this with a huge group of friends, and couldn't believe what I was watching. Between the shitty CGI, the really horrible acting, and the fact I can barley remember shit about this movie. The original was decades ahead of it's time, terrifying, effective, scary, and had a whole different view on slashers. 1984 forever.

10) Dawn Of The Dead Vs. Dawn Of The Dead = Tie
- I worship the original 1978 Dawn Of The Dead. (And this is coming from a huge Day Of The Dead) Nothing will beat the score, the mall setting, and there four characters you become part of as they set of a home for themselves. At first I was bullshit hearing this movie was getting remade, but in my freshman year of high school I was stunned to see how awesome the 2004 remake ended up being. This is a stand alone film. I always look at it as a action version of the first film. We have great characters, tons of action (running zombies, holy shit.), lots of gore, and a heartbreaking ending. One of the better remakes from that decade if so the best.

11) Night Of The Living Dead Vs. Night Of The Living Dead = Remake
- I will give credit where credit is due. Savini...you knew what you were doing. I know people might gasp that I prefer the 1990 remake over the classic black and white original that changed the game of horror in the first place...but I gotta be honest. This film showcased a female lead and instead of crawling into a ball on the floor crying she actually kicked ass. Love the ending to this, as well as the amazing acting from Tony Todd. This man can ACT!

12) The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Vs. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre = Original
- Eh, I might be alone here but as visually stunning as the remake is, nothing can capture the gritty feeling the original had. This film makes you feel like you are watching a snuff film. It's 1970's horror at it's greatest and even though I adore part 2 and 3 nothing bill beat the original. Nothing.

13) When A Stranger Calls Vs. When A Stranger Calls = Tie
- Believe it or not I like When A Stranger Calls Back the made for TV sequel to the original. I like the original. It's creepy, has a clever twist, but I've always felt the beginning and very end of the film were the strongest elements to the first film. The remake could have been more violent, and I feel an R ratting would have made it a million times better (this came out at a time when PG13 horror was the new thing to make money) I loved the lead actress, the beautiful house, as well as how suspenseful the film was. So yeah, clear tie here.

14) The Hitcher Vs The Hitcher = Original 
- Argh, I HATE the remake...HATE IT. So many people loved it, but I'm sorry, the original 1986 film not only is one of my all time favorite films, it's beautiful. The settings are almost dreamlike. The soundtrack haunting, the acting on point, and of course the deeper storyline that's there. C. Thomas Howell's expression when poor Jennifer Jason Leigh is tied up between two moving trucks says it all. This film was legit.

15) The Evil Dead vs The Evil Dead = Original 
- I didn't hate the remake. It was super gory, lots of blood, and followed the overall storyline. Still, blood doesn't make up for a good film. Nothing will beat Sam's original film, as well as the stellar sequel.

16) Fright Night Vs. Fright Night = Original 
- Again, didn't mind the remake. It had it's moments, but Fright Night was one of the best remakes to come out of the 1980's. It had great effects, a great cast, a wonderful soundtrack, and a very attractive vampire. I feel more horror films need to be more original like this one. At least the sequel in 1987 tried to follow it's footsteps better than the remake.

17) Prom Night Vs Prom Night = Tie
- I love the Prom Night films (most of all the highly underrated sequel) Prom Night was one of the first horror movies I ever rented, but I've always seen it as a thriller. It has Jamie Leigh Curtis of course, a masked killer, a great soundtrack, and some pretty memorable moments. Some people say it's slow, but it's a truly great slasher. The remake of course was PG13, but still was pretty creepy. Call it the Lifetime Movie version of the first. Come on guys, that's not always a bad thing.

18) The Fog Vs. The Fog = Original 
- What's my most hated remake? THE FOG. Arghhhhhhhhh. I hate it. PG13 stupid piece of shit. Anyways, just to tell you how I really feel...nothing will beat Carpenter's original. This is one of my favorite ghost stories, and sadly the magic of the original was never captured with this shitty excuse of a movie.

19) The Blob Vs. The Blob = Remake 
- This 80's version of the 50's science fiction film is awesome. It showcases some of the best effects ever. This takes a simple story, and for once uses a good modern take to it. If they ever do remake this film again, take notes from this one. Practical effects all the way!

20) Black Christmas Vs. Black X-Mas = Original
- I like Black X-Mas. It's a guilty pleasure of mine. Hey, I'm telling the truth here. That movie is a mess, but who cares. Around the holidays it's fun to watch after a few drinks. The original tho...one of the scariest movies ever made. Bob Clark really showed how talented it was and this is coming from the dude who made A Christmas Story. One of the scariest twists and moments ever in a horror movie. Just something about the 1970's...it was scary shit!

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